Fun Old Fashioned Family Beatdown

Preamble:

It’s getting to be that time of year again where YHC sits in the warm car up until the last possible minute before getting out into the cold gloom.  Good reminder of how fortunate I am to have a warm car and the opportunity to expose myself to short doses of cold pain in the best F3 region in the best country in the world…Merica!!!

Warm-O-Rama:

Mosey over to the Grindstone track for one lap and circle up

• SSH
• Good Morning
• Windmill

Warm enough to move onto the thang

The Thang:

As much as I do love Die Hard, me thinks National Lampoon’s Christmas Vacation is the best Christmas movie ever made and Clark W. Griswold is the epitome of the classic american dad fumbling his way through the holidays trying to chase after some non-existent ideal of the perfect family Christmas.  Today’s theme was a journey through some of the highlights of the story.

Thang 1 – the perfect Christmas tree

Mosey along the back trail for a route 66 with merkins along the way, ending at the brightest light pole in the whole park.

Thang 2 – park the cars for the family arriving for the holiday

Parking space tracers on both sides of upper lot by the shovel flag

Thang 3 – achieving the land speed saucer record

Wind sprints on the football field from one goal line to the other and back.  This scene seems rather long in the movie so we rinsed and repeated.

Thang 4 – Shitter’s full

Had to empty the chemical toilet with 7’s on a new hill by the b-ball courts.  Naturally we did gas pumpers at the top and squats at the bottom

Thang 5 – SWAT invasion

With the cops swarming on the residence climbing up and down the roof and breaking into the windows, we headed to the pavilion benches for some sets of incline merkins, dips, and derkins.  Civilian cadence with reps of 10, 8, 6, 4, 2

Thang 6 – Jelly of the month club

Nothing turns the arms into jelly quite like bat wings!  (this one is great and look it up in the exicon if you’re not familiar)

MoM – Tis the season to be Mary.  Well that’s my name.  No sh!t!

round robin mary around the group finishing with Sculley’s awful rendition of scissor-kick dying cockroaches.  Wow those sucks…seriously.

COT:

Prayers of thanksgiving for fellow HIM to keep up motivated and accelerating.  Also, TAPS for teens/kids struggling with depression, anxiety, stress, and fear.  Please keep Spit Valve and his family in your prayers as well as Hush Puppy’s nanny’s child who are all struggling here.

Naked-Man Moleskin:

“When Santa squeezes his fat wide a$$ down the chimney tonight, he’s going to find the jolliest bunch of a$$holes this side of the nuthouse.  Ha!”

-Clark (Sparky) W. Griswold